Dear Technical Support,

18 months ago, I upgraded to Girlfriend 1.0 from DrinkingMates 4.2, which
I had used for years without any trouble. However, there are apparently
conflicts between these two products and the only solution was to try and
run Girlfriend 1.0 with the sound turned off. To make matters worse,
Girlfriend 1.0 is incompatible with several other applications, such as
LadsNightOut 3.1, Football 4.5, and Playb*y 6.9.

Successive versions of GirlFriend proved no better. I tried a shareware
program, Slapper 2.1, but it had many bugs and left a virus in my system,
forcing me to shut down completely for several weeks. Eventually, I tried
to run GirlFriend 1.2 and Girlfriend 1.0 at the same time, only to
discover that when these two systems detected each other they caused
severe damage to my hardware.

I eventually upgraded to Fiancee 1.0, only to discover that this product
soon had to be upgraded further to Wife 1.0. While Wife 1.0 tends to use
up all my available resources, it does come bundled with FreeS+xPlus and
Cleanhouse 2003. Shortly after this upgrade, however, I found that Wife
1.0 could be very unstable and costly to run.

Any mistakes I made were automatically stored in Wife 1.0's memory and
could not be deleted. They then resurfaced months later when I had
forgotten about them. Wife 1.0 also has an automatic Diary, Explorer and
E-mail filter, and can, without warning, launch TurboStrop and Whinge.

These latter products have no Help files, and I have to try to guess what
the problem is. Additional problems are that Wife 1.0 needs updating
regularly, requiring Shoe Shop Browser for new attachments and Hairstyle
Express which needs to be reinstalled every sixth week. Also,
when Wife 1.0 attaches itself to my Porsche911 or MercedesEstate hard
drive, it often crashes.
Wife 1.0 also comes with an irritating pop-up called MotherInLaw, which
can't be turned off.

Recently I've been tempted to install Mistress 2004, but there could be
problems. A friend of mine has alerted me to the fact that if Wife 1.0
detects Mistress 2004, it tends to delete all of Money before uninstalling
itself.

Please advise ASAP